Random babbling...

So, I realized I haven't posted much about the kids lately and what little I have said was quick and with not much detail. In searching my heart and mind about why this has happened, I have made a discovery. I am busy. There it is in a nutshell. Oh, don't get me wrong, I am NOT COMPLAINING. That's just the truth of it. I love my life and I love the fact that we have 3 kids and I'm a pastor's wife. I'm just being honest here. In fact, I really would like to have one or two more of the little rug rats. (o:

Kennedy is in school 3 days a week. I leave the house at 8:40 to get her to school by 9:00 and don't get back home until 9:30 (if I don't have some sort of errand to run while I am out). If I have Jude and Kate with me, then of course all of this takes a little bit longer. I leave the house again at 11:40 to pick Kennedy up from school at noon, then again, don't arrive home until 12:30, providing there aren't more errands to run. Then it's lunch, naps, cook dinner, do laundry, make beds, clean the kitchen, etc. Now, all of this is eased on usually one of the 3 days each week when Nancy or Mrs. Shirley or Grandmother & Granddad show up to watch Jude and Kate while run errands and take Kennedy to school. Thank you, LORD, for all the help we have.

Jude has been sick with some sort of stomach bug and without giving too much detail...I have changed at least 30+ diapers on the little guy in a 48 hour period. He has felt rotten and not gotten enough sleep and has just been generally whiny. (Whining is something I don't handle well at all - it's again the rules at our house.) His vocabulary improves from one day to the next. I'm trying to compile a list of words and phrases he uses that are quite amusing. His new favorite is "I do it."

Kate has just started on baby food - veggies. She is doing well and seems to really enjoy them. Her favorites so far are sweet potatoes and sweet peas. She likes to eat a whole jar then chase it with 8 oz of formula. Shades of her brother. Oh yeah, formula, I was able to nurse her for I think it was 20 weeks. Then the milk supply dwindled. I'm thankful I was able to do it that long. That's longer than I was able to nurse either Kennedy or Jude.

So, here are the other discoveries I have made about myself...

Clutter - I am a lunatic when it comes to clutter and my desire to do away with it. I can't stand it in any form, and obsess about it constantly. I have learned in the last few years how to accept it in a couple of rooms in the house simply because I can't get it all done. But the "common" areas of my home (living room, play room, kitchen/dining) must be clutter free and picked up at all times. When they aren't, I guarantee you I am worried about it. If you have children, you know the struggle I am facing here.

Guilt - I am a born-again Child of God. Why do I suffer from guilt? I constantly apologize for things that don't require an apology. I constantly worry about pleasing everyone all the time. If all the laundry isn't done, then I feel guilty. If the house isn't picture perfect when my husband gets home from work, then I feel guilty. If I cooked an amazing dinner, but failed to make a dessert, then I feel guilty. WHY? I don't understand why I have these feelings. Often on my mind is how undeserving I am of my salvation. I should be overwhelmed with a spirit of gratitude, but no - it's guilt. I feel guilty about not doing housework while I am out running errands. I feel guilty because I haven't been updating the blog well lately. Crazy, I know...but true.

Headache - I have had the same recurring headache for over 4 years now. It has very gradually become more and more severe and rears its ugly head more and more often. I have gone to the doctor twice now and the last visit got me two prescriptions. I am supposed to try the meds for a week or two then if I am still having problems, Dr. R wants me to see a neurologist. If it was just a minor little headache, then it would be no big deal. But these bad boys are sometimes debilitating.

Schedule - As I said, I am busy. Cary is busy. We are all busy. A couple of weeks after my grandmother passed away, my grandpa fell and as a result spent a few days in the hospital and is now is rehab. We have been doing some extra travel to see him lately. We have the holidays just around the corner and lot of stuff going on at church (this is a good thing). Again, we're just busy. I think Satan uses busy-ness. It's a great tool, huh? It stresses us, sometimes pulls us away from more important things, and generally occupies our hearts, minds & lives so we think there's no room for God and Godly things...busy-ness creates stress. I am so grateful for the Bible study we are doing right now at church. It has kept me in His Word at a time in my life when it would have been so easy to just put my Bible down during the week.

I'll quit typing now, so as not to further bore you. I will leave you with a devotional thought from my calendar today and ask you the same question I often ask myself...."Oh, where would I be without my God and his mercy and grace?"

He will not allow your foot to be moved; He who keeps you will not slumber. Psalm 121:3 NKJV

When I pray to the Father, I always picture Him sitting in a big, wooden rocking chair and beckoning me to sit on His lap. If you need to destress today, crawl into your heavenly Father's lap and rock awhile.